The in-laws came up huge with an amazing gift. If you drive past our house, you’ll see a small leg lamp in the window, a replica of the cussing dad’s big prize in “A Christmas Story.” Our teenager is appalled that I would display this fine piece of craftsmanship in such a prominent space but, hey, she doesn’t pay the mortgage.

Ohio State football fans got a big lump of coal last week when the NCAA surprised everyone by banning the Buckeyes from a bowl game ... next season. There’s no way the fallout from Jim Tressel’s dirty little secret should stretch into 2012. But it will.

The NCAA allegedly employs bright people who could consult a calendar and figure out that Ohio State was in line for a bowl game this year. Why not step up the pace and drop this bombshell a month earlier? That way, OSU doesn’t go to a meaningless bowl game this season.

On the other hand, the arrogant OSU administration has fumbled at every turn, from the ridiculous news conference during which Tressel was given a big smooch to the weak self-imposed sanctions. If there was any hint of this coming down, OSU should have said no to the Gator Bowl.

I’m sure the attorneys are drawing up Gene Smith’s golden parachute right now.

The NBA tips off today after what seemed like a three-day exhibition season. The most intriguing story line is not the status of Kobe Bryant’s wrist or why Mariah Carey is not part of the league’s marketing plan.

The big question: How long will it take Jack Nicholson to snub the Lakers for the Clippers?

Jill sent me to that fancy new Kroger store in Kettering two days before Christmas. I’m sure she was laughing, but I survived my first trip to the store despite the hand-to-hand combat in the baking goods aisle.

A big thanks to Mary, who checked me out. She asked if I had a Kroger card and my reply was a blank stare. She told me to punch in my phone number, which led to 22 bucks of savings!

Merry Christmas to all of you vociferous readers. We’ll return next week with some New Year’s resolutions for athletes, etc. If you have any suggestions, send them my way and I’ll give you credit for your clever ideas.

Contact this reporter at (937) 225-2163 or bkollars@DaytonDailyNews.com.