Pie judge adds dash of education

Diana Spillman offers some fruit basics as she selects the winners.

Diana Spillman, dietetics professor at Miami University, has been judging pies and other food contests at the Butler County Fair for over 20 years.

Staff photo by Richard O Jones Diana Spillman, dietetics professor at Miami University, has been judging pies and other food contests at the Butler County Fair for over 20 years.

ENLARGE PHOTO

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By Richard O Jones, Staff Writer 1:19 AM Wednesday, July 27, 2011

HAMILTON — “I wouldn’t run if that was thrown at me,” Diana Spillman said Tuesday morning as she swooned over one of the peach pies laid out in a scrumptious row in the Butler County Fair’s Arts & Produce Hall.

“Not a bad pie,” she continued as she laid a third-place ribbon beside it. “In any other county, it would take first place.”

After 20 years of judging pies at the fair, Spillman still has her work cut out for her. There were 95 pies to be sliced into “small, ladylike pieces,” then explored, tasted and critiqued Tuesday. There are 13 categories, including “Your Favorite Pie” catch-all. Apple is the biggest category with 15 entries to be judged.

But with Spillman at the fork, the judging also is an educational experience. With each category, she offers a little background on the basics of the fruit or filling under consideration. Butterscotch needs to be nearly burned, but not quite, she explained. Tart green apples are the best for making apple pie. And for about the 20th time: Use the metal pie pans for decorations or to scare off raccoons in your garden. The best pies are made in glass pans. And every once in a while, she makes a pitch for the fair’s building fund so she can have a nice, air conditioned place to put on her show next year.

Her patter is part Julia Child, part Joan Rivers — instructional and informative, sometimes just a little bawdy.

“Cooking is making love to food,” she said. “Take it low and slow and you’ll be satisfied.”

And when a pie turned out to be particularly delicious, Spillman did a little dance as the flavor settled on her tongue, exclaiming, “That’s a tail-wagger!”

“This, ladies and gentlemen, is the taste of paradise,” she cooed at another. “If this is a man’s pie, I’ll marry you.”

“This one’s a beauty,” she said of one about to get second place. “But I have to find fault.” She paused to think about something critical to say. “I’m fat and 60. That’s a fault. The pies are perfect.”

The rest of the year, Spillman is a professor at Miami University, teaching nutrition and doing research into various food issues.

“I’ve eaten my way around the world,” she said, and she’s serious when she says that Butler County pies are the best in the state, partly, it may be inferred, due to her work as a judge.

“We’ve had open judging since the beginning, and people here are smart,” she explained. “They listen to the judges and continue to learn every year.

“This county has a real cultural richness. If you look at the people who came here through the centuries, they all brought their own ideas and traditions, and we have an abundance of natural richness, too.”

She’s also an advocate for homestyle food preservation, encouraging people to take advantage of the bounties of the land.

“We’re losing our culinary culture, and it scares the hell out of me,” she said. “We should all be canning and freezing.”

And we should be creative with it. During a break in the judging, she took a jar of green jelly off the shelf behind her and passed it around for her audience to smell.

“Looks like mint,” she said, “but it’s basil jelly,” and rattles off some of the possible uses, including as a garnish for venison or rabbit.

“I love to teach people,” she said. “And I love pies. I think everyone should make one every week.”

Contact this reporter at (513) 820-2188 or rjones@coxohio.com.

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