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'We refuse to give up': Families work hard to help their children find a place in the world

By Linda Ebbing

Sunday, February 24, 2008

HAMILTON — Noelle Bates wants to be a cheerleader when she gets older and, if given the opportunity, will do some cheers for you.

Timmy Fannin can tell you just about anything that has happened in the world of NASCAR over the last several years.

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Gabriel Cochran is a "Star Wars" fan, has probably watched the movies 20 times in his young life and can do a mean imitation of all the characters.

All three do well in school, help around the house, play video games and like to hang with their friends. They're typical second-graders in most ways, except that Noelle, Timmy and Gabriel have autism, a condition characterized by impaired social interaction, problems with verbal and nonverbal communication and unusual, repetitive or severely limited activities.

Experts estimate that three to six children out of every 1,000 will have autism. As early as infancy, a baby with autism may be unresponsive to people or focus intently on one item to the exclusion of others for long periods of time.

Many children with autism have a reduced sensitivity to pain, but are abnormally sensitive to sound, touch or other sensory stimulation and resist being cuddled or hugged.

Experts say that early diagnosis and invention programs, such as those offered at the Janet Clemmons Center, can help.

Danielle Bates suspected autism in Noelle at age 2. Tests confirmed it. Denial and depression followed.

Then Bates decided, "There's no time for me to sit and ask why ... what can we do to fix it? The longer you sit around, the more time you lose."

She took Noelle to the Clemmons center, where she learned "everything."

"She went from being nonverbal to the point that I was worried she was talking nonstop," Bates said.

Good insurance allowed Danielle and her husband, Jeff Bates Sr., to put Noelle in private speech and therapy sessions. However, Bates had to fight to get an aide for Noelle when she started kindergarten.

"Noelle is really smart and is an excellent speller," Bates said. "She might struggle, but once she gets it, she's there." Noelle also went from not liking "the feel" of a keyboard to becoming proficient on the computer.

She has sensory issues and doesn't like to be touched, and has trouble expressing her feelings and emotions in the right way, Bates said.

"But therapy and teachers have made all the difference in her progress, along with support from her peers, who took her in right away."

Hopefully, Bates said, "in 10 years Noelle will be attending college ... like her brothers and sister. But that's what all parents want for their kids — for them ... not to have to depend on anyone."

The minute 7-year-old Timmy Fannin comes home from school, he sits down to do his homework.

From there, he is likely to play with the miniature NASCAR track his dad built for him or play video games.

He also might decide to make a list of who went first — for instance if his dogs went outside, which one went outside first or if his family is going somewhere, who went outside first.

Timmy obsesses on being first and winning, including academics, said his mother, Sandy Fannin.

"If he doesn't get an A+ it destroys his mood."

Luckily he is pretty much an A+ student and does well in school and in most social situations, which Fannin and her husband Tim attribute to lots of intervention programs.

Timmy was diagnosed with autism when he was 18 months old, Fannin said.

"When he was just months old and was sad, mad or happy he would flap his arms and hold his breath, and he didn't try to talk when he got older," she said. "I knew something was wrong."

At his 1-year checkup Fannin was told that Timmy had a profound hearing loss. Later he was diagnosed with autism.

"Sometimes Timmy's speech is affected, and people can't understand him, and he doesn't notice people don't understand. And he spits out what he is thinking. It's almost impossible for him to lie.

"He's perfect on the outside," she said. "To look at him you would think there is nothing wrong with him ... but his disability is on the inside."

He has many quirks, such as sensitivity to textures of food.

"He doesn't like to be around loud noises and lots of commotion," Fannin said.

Fannin hopes when Timmy grows up he finds his niche — "maybe on a computer or in a lab. I hope he dives into a career that he loves and he is so good at it they keep him despite any problems he might have."

Gabriel Cochran watches the "Star Wars" movies several times a week and can quote almost any line of dialogue. He uses his imagination when playing with his "Star Wars" toys to recreate his favorite scenes from the movies.

Due to a developmental delay often connected with prematurity, Gabriel's autism was diagnosed a little later than usual, said his mother, Janie Cochran, and he has struggled with respiratory, vision and speech issues since birth.

Gabriel attended preschool at Westover Preparatory for two years and then moved to the Janet Clemmons Center for early intervention.

He receives speech therapy, occupational therapy and physical therapy through the school system.

"Gabriel is very friendly and happy most all of the time," Cochran said. "He laughs at silly songs, silly sounds, physical humor, and loves hugs, thumbs up and high fives."

He also loves music — either singing a song that he just memorized or trying to play the drums, piano or guitar during Praise Band rehearsals at the presbyterian church, said his father, David Cochran.

Gabriel's big sister, Chloe, helps him with his reading, and they often draw pictures together to adorn the refrigerator.

Gabriel does super with spelling because he can memorize so well and he likes to read, but struggles with comprehension, Janie Cochran said.

"The school day can sometimes be very long for him and he struggles most mornings getting ready to go to school, but once he is there he's a different person — happy, talking to friends and staff as if he couldn't wait to see them again," Cochran said.

He works hard at school, but is easily frustrated, she said.

"He likes his friends, but struggles to communicate with them," Cochran said. "He does not always understand the give and take in a conversation and can misread body language or voice volume."

He doesn't like loud, busy places like the school cafeteria or indoor sports arenas, and will cover his ears in protest.

"Gabriel is just so sweet and good hearted," Cochran said. "He is honest, funny, sees joy in every day and truly lives in the moment. If it were not for his battle with autism, we believe that Gabriel would be able to reveal to all his true intelligence and his hidden God-given talents.

"We pray every day for a cure or a more effective treatment for children like our son," Cochran said. "Gabriel and others like him deserve to have a future where they can reach for their own particular star and not be written off as just a disabled person who cannot fully function in regular society.

"We still have hope and refuse to give up on him now and we certainly don't want the medical community, the schools and our society to give up on him either."

Contact this reporter at (513) 820-2158 or lebbing@coxohio.com.

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