Lakota East senior finds place to call home

No obstacle will stand in the way of one teen’s dream of success

Amber Sharp works Monday, May 23, 2011 behind the deli counter of the Reading IGA in Cincinnati. Sharp will graduate Lakota East High School this year after being mostly homeless for the past few years.

Gary Stelzer/Staff photographer Amber Sharp works Monday, May 23, 2011 behind the deli counter of the Reading IGA in Cincinnati. Sharp will graduate Lakota East High School this year after being mostly homeless for the past few years.

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By Lindsey Hilty, Staff Writer Updated 12:02 AM Sunday, May 29, 2011

LIBERTY TWP. — There were nights when Lakota East High School senior Amber Sharp slept in the woods near Cincinnati-Dayton Road and I-75.

Beneath the canopy of trees, with only a stranger’s tent for shelter, she was free from the wide variety of abuse she faced for years while under the roofs of relatives, friends and near strangers.

Labeled as homeless, the 18-year-old was determined to have one constant in her life — Lakota. It was the place where she felt motivated to succeed; the place where she had made the choice to value education; the place her heart called home.

Just two weeks before graduation, while her peers were finishing up school work and preparing for the festivities to come, Sharp was trying to figure out how to apply to Cincinnati State University without the funds to pay both her rent and application fees, and without transportation to file paperwork to waive the fees.

She had taken off work at the IGA in Reading — the first break she’d had in 10 days — but was too drained to travel with her guidance counselor downtown to face more paperwork. Once she finishes the enrollment process, Sharp will be one step closer to her dream of becoming a pharmacist or a nurse.

She’ll take that step, she said. She’ll get there.

Sharp has no pomp and circumstances planned for June 4, 2011, when she walks away with her diploma. The opportunity to break free from the trials of her past is celebration enough.

“Where to begin,” she said, letting out a deep breath before launching into her story.

It was 7:30 a.m. April 19 when the 11-year-old awoke to the blaring television. She’ll never forget the sight of her mother — who had battled breast and lung cancer since she was pregnant with Amber — slumped against the bathtub where she had died sometime during the night.

“I remember that day better than I remember anything, honestly,” Sharp said. “She was my everything. I slept with her in the bed until that day. We were very attached.”

Sharp counted off on her fingers the schools she attended in the years to follow. There were at least 10. At each house, she sought a home. Instead, she encountered alcoholic relatives, drug users, physical and psychological abusers and loneliness. Some guardians were better than others, but with practically nothing material to call her own and no home where she felt accepted or loved, Sharp said she was desperate and at a breaking point more than once after her mom died. She was badly beaten by her brother, who was placed in a separate foster care home. She gained 80 pounds in two years, because one guardian only fed her fast food. She cut herself a few times, trying to escape emotional pain. She felt trapped and helpless.

“You really see people’s true colors,” she said. “I used to get so depressed — so broke down.”

It was then that she met a nurse, who not only listened, but imparted wisdom.

“If I did not have her, I don’t know what I would have done,” Sharp said. “She would tell me all the time, ‘Education is all your have in life. You need to take the most advantage you can out of it to get anywhere.’ I listened to her. She would just constantly say ‘get good grades and get scholarships.’ I got it together real quick.”

Partway through her ninth-grade year, Sharp said she decided to focus on school, because her life depended on it. When she again was moved to another school district, she felt her dreams slipping away.

That’s when she fled, becoming homeless at age 16. Her silver lining was Lakota, the district she then chose as her home, and legally would remain so no matter where she laid her head to sleep at night.

“This was the school that had meant the most to me, because I tried the hardest and had the most motivation,” she said. “I love it. This was like my heart. This was where I could vent, and this was where I could be and not have to deal with the situations at home.”

Sharp, who also attended classes at Butler Tech, moved from place to place with her girlfriend, living where they could until they got kicked to the curb by a relative who would not accept their relationship. It was then they faced the nights alone without shelter. Eventually, they earned enough money at their jobs to split an apartment in Reading with two relatives.

Guidance Counselor Denise McLinden said it took many people to ensure Sharp could remain in Lakota and to help her thrive. Each one recognized something special about the teen.

“I think we’re so suburban and so unaware of the most troubled kids, and what their plate is,” McLinden said. “She wants to pull herself out of all misfortune and become something. She’s quick. She’s got a great sense of humor. She’s bright, witty.”

She’s driven.

“The biggest thing with me is that nobody in my family has really gotten anywhere,” Sharp said. “I know nobody’s going to take care of me or my future except for me. I heard that people that grow up in those types of environments stay in that type of environment ... I’m struggling right now, but I know I have to go to college, or I’m not going to go anywhere. If I had blown my school off, I wouldn’t have anything. I feel like I have gone through all these hard things ... I’m more proud of myself than anything. I did this on my own. When it comes down to it, I’ve learned you can’t blame anybody for anything. Nobody really understands each situation a student goes through. If some people only understood how easy they had it, versus me who’s had to fight and fight and fight — if you realized how blessed you are ... you shouldn’t take anything for granted.”